The Human Equation: Notes on a Dream
by jcmoorehead
Summary: Side story to The Human Equation, set after the fic ends. Asuka has decided to learn an instrument and chosen Shinji to teach her how to play music, this is their first lesson together.


A/N: This is inspired by a scene in one of the chapters of The Human Equation in which Shinji & Asuka are discussion Shinji playing the Cello. Shinji remarks that he thinks Asuka would be suited to playing something like the guitar. So she gets herself a guitar and Shinji agrees to help her learn to play it. Warning WAFF/Fluff follows, this was a lot of fun to write and is fairly light.

* * *

"Shinji slow down!"

"I'm trying to go as slow I can."

"No you're not, you're still going too fast!"

"Sorry! I just thought-"

"Yeah well stop and actually give me a chance to get my hand on it first!"

Shinji placed his hand across the top of the cello to mute all sound and watched as Asuka sighed at him. This hadn't gone as he had planned. He could definitely put teaching as a profession he didn't want any part of. Then again he imagined most students were not like Asuka Langley Sohryu.

"And turn off that stupid beeping for a moment will you!"

He switched off the metronome he had set up on the table next to them. Why he had agreed to do this he didn't know. Something had gotten into his head that it'd be fun and romantic. Asuka had taught him how to swim so he'd teach her how to play music. He might not know the instrument but he could at least teach her the basics of playing songs and they could play together.

He looked across at her. Even with the angry expression on her face the instrument seemed to be a perfect fit for her. Just like he had said in the cabin all those weeks ago. Asuka was definitely not a classical instrument sort of person, the guitar just seemed to fit her perfectly. The guitar she had chosen was nice to look at as well. A cherry red Stratocaster. Expensive but money hadn't been an issue, they had been given something of a sizeable sum due to their part in saving the world… twice.

"Maybe this wasn't a good idea, we should have gotten you a proper music tea-"

"No! I can do this, just… slow it down a bit more."

Asuka looked down at the sheets of paper in front of her. She was determined to get this right and make it work with Shinji. He had gone to so much effort for her already. He had spent the last two days researching how to play the guitar, printing off diagrams of the chords and scales for her. Coming up with a way for them to practice. Even getting the tablature for a few simple riffs for her to try out.

She had wanted to try it herself, but he had insisted. It was going to be his way of repaying her for teaching him how to swim. The sheet she was concerned with at the moment was a basic chord sequence.

C – D – Am – G – D – C – Am – G – C – D – Am – G – D – C – Am – G

Shinji had told her that the sequence had been picked out especially. It was from a song but they weren't going to be playing the song just. Instead the idea was to get her hand used to moving and changing the shape of her hands on the guitar. He would play a note for four beats on his cello before switching to the next one. Asuka therefor had to strum each chord four times and then switch to the next one in the sequence.

It seemed simple enough but Asuka's hand just didn't want to co-operate one little bit. She knew what she needed to do, and where she needed to place her fingers but getting there was such hard work. Either Shinji would play the next note before she got the chance to get in place. Either that or her fingers weren't holding down the strings enough or too much creating an annoying buzzing sound through her amp.

Shinji picked up the metronome and dialled the tempo down on it just a bit more. Taking it from 80 beats per minute down to 60 beats per minute. Asuka curiously leafed through the sheets looking at the various riffs and notes Shinji had printed out.

"You really went all out with this didn't you?"

Shinji smiled, "Well yeah. I wanted it to be perfect for you. I even went through them myself to make sure they were right."

 _'He went to all that effort for me? There must be twenty or so tracks here! All the other notes as well… I have to get this right now… I can't fail again!'_

She looked through the riffs again only just realizing that these hadn't been printed, they were all handwritten by Shinji.

"How… how long did this take you?"

"Most of yesterday, I did it while you and Misato were out shopping. I wrote up the scales and chords last night."

"I see…"

Asuka looked along her guitar again. She would master this, she'd get there. If she could pilot the Evangelion, if she could get a degree at fourteen and if she could save the world she could master an instrument. It was time to focus.

"Okay Shinji! Let's do this! And then when we do I want to learn one of these riffs."

He smiled, "Which one?"

She shrugged, "I… which one do you recommend. You're the expert aren't you, I'm placing myself in your hands."

Shinji thought about what might be suitable for them to try. There were a lot of riffs there from classic to more modern stuff. He wanted to pick something that'd be easy enough for her to learn but he could also play on the Cello as well. He knew Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple was generally a good riff for beginners to learn. Asuka would definitely know the song so that'd help. There was also Sunshine of Your Love by Cream. Slightly more advanced than Smoke on the Water but it'd get her fingers moving around a bit more.

"I have a few ideas, let's get through this first."

Asuka nodded and placed her hand up towards the top of the guitars neck again. She would get it right this time. She would prove she could do it to Shinji. It was unfair, he made playing music look so easy. Over the last few weeks she'd watch him playing the Cello in their room. Watch as his left hand glided effortlessly up and down the neck, his fingers working their magic. His right hand gliding back and forth, drawing the bow across the strings releasing some wonderful sounds.

Shinji had once told her the instrument never really sounded happy but he was wrong. It was all in how he played it and what he played it. She had heard him play some happy and uplifting music on it and also some sad music as well. He would put himself into it when he played. She wanted to be able to do that with the guitar, she had to be able to do that.

Shinji switched the metronome back on. One high pitched beep sounded, then three dull ones afterwards. She counted alone with it.

 _'One – Two – Three – Four – One – Two – Three – Four'_

Shinji looked at her, his hand in position to play the first note, his bow also primed.

"Ready?"

She nodded and placed her hand in the position for the C chord. As the metronome signalled the next round of four she strummed the note as Shinji began to play the C. She strummed again for the next beep, then the next and finally for the fourth. As the fourth strum rang out she gently released her hand and got it ready to press down again for the D chord.

As soon as the higher beep emerged she strummed downwards. Switching from the C to D chord was something she had started to get used to. It was a simple transition, she heard the note sing out from Shinjis cello accompanying her down-strokes on the guitar. She felt her plectrum slipping slightly after the second down stroke but pushed the end back out with her thumb just in time for the third one. There was a slight buzz from one of the strings but she ignored it as she played the fourth strum and released her hand again.

Now she positioned her hand again for the A minor chord. This was also a simple transition. She pressed down just in time for the next set of four and for Shinji to play the note. She could feel the tips of her fingers hurting as she pressed down but she ignored it and managed to play through the set of four down strokes. Releasing her hand, now was the trickier one. Moving to the G Chord. There was enough time for it though.

Her index finger went to the correct string, her middle finger, her ring made it. Her little finger was edging closer to the string. Just touching it as the metronome sounded the start of the next for. Pressing down she strummed just as Shinji played the G. She had managed to do it but her little finger was slipping off the string. She tried to hold it in place for the second down stroke, and then for the third…

"God damnit!"

She yelled as her finger slipped off the string and the chord fell apart. Almost immediately Shinji muted the strings of his cello and turned off the metronome.

"Wait Asuka!"

It was too late, she had already taken the guitar off and placed it down before storming out of the room. Shinji sighed and leaned the cello up against the wall before standing up and heading out of the room. He exited just in time to hear the front door slam. Without giving it a second thought he put his shoes on, grabbed the key and followed her. He already knew where she would be.

* * *

Asuka peered into the fridge and pulled out one of the cold cans from within. Her fingertips immediately felt strange on coming into contact with the cold beverage. Her stupid uncooperative fingers. They had been trying for an hour and what did she have to show for it. Absolutely nothing, her hand just wouldn't cooperate with her mind and Shinji was making it look so easy on his Cello.

A voice rang out in her mind, _'Yeah but he's been playing for years… you know that.'_

Immediately the other side of her mind gave a reply, _'Doesn't matter, I should be better than this! It's not exactly difficult…'_

 _'So what are you going to give up?'_

 _'No of course not but… it's so frustrating. He's so perfect and all I'm doing is holding him back. It's exactly like-'_

"It's like the time we had to learn to dance isn't it? That's what you're thinking right?"

She felt a warmth as Shinjis arms wrapped around her from behind. He pulled her back and snuggled his head into her shoulder.

"You mean me storming out angrily and you following me to see if I was alright? Yeah, except this time you at least have the sense to hug me."

"In my defence I thought you'd have hit me back then."

"I might hit you now. You can never be too safe from me… I suppose at least I'm not being threatened with being replaced by Rei this time."

She felt Shinji smile as he held her, "I can go and find her if you'd like?"

"Yeah just complete my humiliation, I bet she'd be able to play a G chord as well. That'd be just like her."

Asuka stepped forward removing herself from his embrace and turning to face him. Her face was red from embarrassment at storming away like she had done.

"I bet you think I'm pretty stupid for storming out huh?"

Shinji shook his head, "No of course not, it's frustrating and sometimes you need to step away. I've had to do it plenty of times with the Cello. I especially had to do it when I was learning the piano."

"Yeah I gue- hold on you play the piano as well!?"

Shinji nodded, "Yeah… only a little bit though. I learned in school before moving to Tokyo-3 but never kept it up like I did the Cello."

"Great, so now I learn my boyfriends gifted on two instruments while I'm struggling with one."

"It's not like that Asuka I-"

"I know it isn't but it's the whole pride thing isn't it. I know I need to practice, I know I need to learn and it'll take time but I watch you and you make playing look so easy. You barely look like you're concentrating and your hands just… they flow across your cello like it's nothing and there I am struggling to make my little finger stay on the string. In an hour all I've got to show for my effort are four stupid looking dents in my fingertips and a bruised ego."

"Look I'll get that for you, meet me outside…"

Shinji reached into the fridge pulling out a drink for himself and grabbed the one off of Asuka. Before she could protest he had paid for them and was already walking out of the store.

 _'Idiot! When the hell did he grow that spine I'm going... to kill him.'_

"Shinji!"

"Y-Yeah…"

"You… why… I could have paid for that myself you know…"

"I know but I felt I should, besides I owed you it for upsetting you the first time around."

She smirked, "Yeah I guess you did."

Both of them sat on the curb looking down the street. It was the middle of May and that brought with it hot sun. In the distance cranes could be seen lifting materials to aid with the repairs to the buildings. For the last month they had lived in the city peacefully, adjusting to life as regular schoolkids. They had even had a surprise when hearing from Misato when she had visited Tokyo-3. Rei Ayanami had been found, she had emerged from the sea of LCL there with no memory of what had happened.

It has been a shock to Shinji getting used to seeing Rei again. He had thought that after Third Impact Rei would have been gone forever. It had been a shock to Asuka too, her feelings towards Rei had always been somewhat complex, even more so now that she had learned that Rei was something like Shinji's sister.

Rei had changed too, she wasn't as distant as she used to be. She had been reaching out to them, attempting to take part in their activities and integrate herself with the group. It had been a frustrating experience for Asuka who had decided that as a favour to Shinji she would make the most effort to help Rei integrate with them all but she was making the effort.

Asuka gazed over at the buildings wondering if this was truly their life from now on or was something else lurking around the corner. She had started to see her father more, resolve some of the issues that they had. Shinji had a slightly better relationship with his father. It wasn't perfect but it had only been a few months, there were wounds there that could take years to heal.

"You know I'm not used to not being very good at something."

Shinji glanced at her, "Even when you started piloting Eva?"

She nodded, "I knew from an early age I'd be a pilot so I didn't really have a concept of not being very good when I was younger. Besides all I had to do for the longest time was sit in an entry plug and think about how amazing I was. The better I felt about being in the plug, the more confident I was resulted in a better sync ratio so I never experienced not being very good."

"You were amazing in your first battle…"

"Yeah, I had a lot of practice in a simulator. They didn't really know what to expect so I had to fight stupid things in there like Godzilla or this strange Tripod like robot. So I already knew how to fight and I guess… it just came naturally to me."

She paused for a moment, "Even in school it all came easily to me. This is the first time I've had to genuinely struggle to learn something and… I hate it."

"You'll get there Asuka! It's just going to take time."

She sighed again, "I know… I know… I'm just impatient. I can't expect to be like David Gilmour in a day. It'd just be nice to be able to play that chord sequence without messing it up. I just can't switch to that G. If I struggle with that what is it going to be like when we try an F Chord or a B minor?"

Shinji shrugged, "It's the same when I learn a new song, even with how long I've been playing I still need time to adjust to the order of the notes, the tempo and the rhythm. I can learn them a little bit faster but only because my hands are used to changing their shape so rapidly. Yours will too, it won't even take as long as you think."

"You think?"

He nodded, "I reckon you'll have it mastered by the time we've finished today. Sometimes stepping away from it for a small amount of time can be good."

Shinji stood up and held out his hand to her, "Shall we try again."

Grabbing his hand she stood up and nodded, "Yeah let's do it. Just be prepared to buy me ice cream later if all doesn't go well. In fact be prepared to buy me ice cream in case it does!"

* * *

An hour later Asuka was playing the final down stroke on the G chord just in time for Shinji to mute the strings on his cello. Both of them had a smile on their face. It had taken them a while but Asuka had finally managed to play through the entire sequence for the first time. There was a brief moment during one chord change where she felt her hand start to cramp but she had powered through. Another moment she had been half a beat behind the metronome but was able to correct herself. The troublesome G Chord had also posed a thread at one point but she had relaxed herself and managed to meet the challenge.

It was just like Shinji had said, stepping away from it for a short time and having that short break had helped. Her hand had recovered. As she had played through the notes she had felt a familiarity to them, like she had heard that sequence somewhere before. In fact she knew she had done, Shinji had already told her as much when they started. He just hadn't told her what song it was.

"Hey Shinji… what song was that from anyway?"

Shinji gave a sly smile, "You really want to know."

"I'm asking aren't I?"

"I'll play it properly, it might sound a bit strange though. I haven't tried it yet."

"Just play it!"

Shinji sat up and began to ready himself to play the cello again. Asuka listened intently to the notes as he began to play the intro sequence to the song. Almost immediately she recognized it, how could she not. The intro was so distinctive. He moved past the intro playing the next passage. A note perfect rendition of the solo. It faded out of the solo into the familiar chords she had been playing and she could almost hear the words of the song being sung in her head.

 _'So… so you think you can tell,  
Heaven from hell,  
Blue skies from pain…'_

She kept on listening to him play, completely entranced by his actions on the instrument. His hands moving fluidly as he moved from the verses to the chorus, to the solo and back to the chorus again. It was exactly as she had said before, he made it look like it was no effort at all. Occasionally his eyes would meet hers, causing them to both smile that little bit more.

Eventually he brought the song to a close and Asuka couldn't help but applaud him.

"Very good, it was perfect!"

"You really think? I didn't transcribe the guitar solo properly, I just kinda played what I felt was right…"

"It was amazing Shinji…"

She placed her guitar down and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. He really had no idea of just how good he was, his modesty was almost annoying to her in a way. She wished he would make more of himself but then he wouldn't be Shinji if he did that.

Asuka settled back in her seat and picked up the guitar again. There was a renewed determination after hearing Shinji play that. She'd play through that chord sequence again, she'd learn how to play it perfectly and one day she'd play the song for him.

She locked her eyes onto his, "Can I… try it again? I think I can do it better this time."


End file.
